She met a tornado of thoughts after the day she realized her happiness is not being with him.
She spent her nights staring the moon playing with white clouds, in the dark sky. She questioned herself alot of times. She never wanted to be the reason of any tear falling from his eye.
She called him "hi!"
"Hi, my love!" He replied.
"Are you drunk?" She noticed his accent.
"A little bit. Out with friends tonight" he replied
"Oouh.. sorry. Enjoy with them. We can talk later." She said and was about to cut the call.
"No, we are just talking about you only. I'm so lucky to have you. Infact, my friends too wonder, how can you can date a guy like me?"
She smiled and asked "Really?"
"Yes! Thank you for being with me." His words made her to think again about my words.
"I love you." She said and disconnected the call without waiting for his reply.
She walked to the patio and relaxed on the chair and kept looking into the sky for hours.
She thought about those days when she was craving for love, and for him she was just an option till he get the one he actually deserves.
She smiled and recite the line for the sky to listen what he said to her.... "untill the time I don't get my dreamgirl, you can be my girlfriend because I have no other better option for now."
She closed her eyes and wiped the tear rolling and smiled at the laughter he made just after she asked "what?" as a reaction on the sentence he said and turned into the joke.
She was a joke to him all the time,
And today just because his friend said something, may be to get paid for his drink, it recalled him of my love.
She spent her entire night thinking about every incident when she needed him and always found herself alone.
She now, doesn't trust him anymore.
Everytime, she even think to approach him for some help she either get excuses or the taunts of being a failure
She now knew that she deserves to be alone instead of in the relationship that is causing a giant cavity in her life.
They met,
She hold his hand ,
And told him that she is not happy in this relationship. Instead of supporting her decision he accused her that she must be cheating on him with some other guy.
That actually broke her. I clearly remember her reply. She said "Yes! I was cheating....from always. I was cheating myself for being with you. The time I should have given to myself, my pleasure, my happiness, my career, my worth... I gave that to you. I cheated myself with you."
They both cried alot that day. I don't know the reason for his tears.
But she.... She was crying because she betrayed her weaker version.
I won't lie that she stayed happily ever after that,
But yes! She stayed strong. She now knows well, that her peace is not in being with someone strong... but in the search of the strength in her own core.
